Taking charge of your own life and proving you are able to is something a lot of people cannot manage. Sobriety is a matter of struggle and wanting to improve. Success is made from this and failure is due in part to laziness. Sobriety and relapse is a fight between two powers living a sensible life and the destruction of addictions. Do you have the power to keep addictions away or the weakness to invite them in? The fear of losing sobriety or addictions? What loss will you experience by choosing one or the other? Unspoken thoughts like guilt that remains like a stain on a rug? Like a strong wind pushing you to the booze? Consume enough so you don’t hear your own thoughts? What is the strong motivation that is pushing you away from recovery? What are you afraid of losing? Can’t live with personal abuse from your friends because you chose to be sober? You would rather live with a disaster in your life than stay sober? Your reason or reasons for doing this are all stupid reasons. If you don’t know the reason you are refusing sobriety you must find it and kill it off. This is blocking morality from entering your life and welcoming addictions to control you. This happened to me and I killed it off in rehab. It never returned. All through my sobriety morality is my decision maker. How many more years until you start living a moral life? The thoughts of my past life as a boozer sends a slight fear through me. I have no interest in returning to my nightly binges the fear keeps me away from it as it should for everyone.
Is today the moment when all your grief ends? Go to rehab and watch it all begin.
see ya’ next time
