Month: June 2021

The cheers and the smiles from the night before will last until sunrise. Now the grief starts to irritate our conscience. Memories of guilt begins as we slowly try to remember fragments of our nightly binge. Worrying about what may have happened. What have I done? We never put this behind us just add more grief to what’s already there. Heard enough? Stories we try to remember and try to make amends the best we can. This only lasts until the next binge. How can this be corrected? To stop using addictions is the answer. The ill feeling and the excuses we make-up and no one believes. Every time this happens the less interested in us people become. Laugh it off but inside only the feeling of disappointment is there. There is no victory. We lost every battle we ever fought. Our own private conflicts that we bring home with us. Guilt is driving us to madness. How many years until we say enough is enough? The weekend is here as we plan for the next binge. Not quite over the guilt of last weeks binge then we go back for more. All through the binge we pretend not to care and brag that nothing bothers us. Feel like kings until we sober up. The life of booze is nothing more than a pretend world. Bar time is closed time to go home and sleep off your hangover. Welcome to a repeat performance. It’s here.

It’s Daylight Again

You heard enough but not lived it enough to quit?

see ya’ next time

To believe that we can and must hide the parts of us that are broken. Out of fear that others are incapable of loving the parts of us that we cannot love ourselves. Is to believe that sunshine is incapable of entering a broken window and warming an empty room.

www.sandrakring.com

Our decisions can alter our lives just pursue an interest. You already know what to do. Many pursuits end in failure because we were never interested when we started them. Same with the jobs we accepted. In every short lived pursuit there is always lack of interest. We must live on our own because we are all we have. We all suffer a crash landing at least once or twice in our lives. We are not worthless the pursuit was. Aim your sights higher. Your calling may be in the distance. When the sun enters our broken lives we may see things about ourselves we never knew was there. The reason we never found it is because we searched a dark room. Ourselves. Our lack of confidence. Lack of education makes it difficult to get a job. I know. I struggled with this for years. Gets harder all the time. I didn’t become a writer overnight. Years of reading one book then another. Mistakes makes perfect. If we stay inside a dark room too long we may never come back out. I have written many pages that made no sense at all. No one would have the interest in reading them. Nose to the grindstone and shoulder to the wheel and face life as it comes. That’s how I became a writer. I never gave up. Addictions will cause the worst of times. How much more can you carry? It’s not a matter of choice. Start again or you may never again.

“Mend your broken window and start again.”

see ya’ next time